he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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