Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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