This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
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I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I don't deserve a penis
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
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THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You've changed since you got that strap on
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