ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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