Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Small penises have feelings too.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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