I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Randomize
