If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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