So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
