In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize