so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
