I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
