Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i drank out of a bidet.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
