i need an iv and a liver transplant
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i was born a porn star she said
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
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