she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
