I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
