Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
