super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
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