...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I want to fling myself into the sun
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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