Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
