I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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