when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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