so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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