You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
