no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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