Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
