So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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