walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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