Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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