...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
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