Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
