You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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