I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
