Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize