is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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