I'm really into asian looking animals
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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