Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
