I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
