God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize