Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
