why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
My balls are so social today.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
