im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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