suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
