Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
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