I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
