that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
