Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
