Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just want to make out with him forever
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
