coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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