her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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