Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
